EVENTS described as “political” are taking place at an increasing rate.

The politics are causing widespread alarm and distress across a huge swathe of the population as they cast uncertainty across many different aspects of people’s lives. Yet there is currently no sign of their diminishment.

And while politics have been occurring for many years, those currently taking place surpass it for their levels of unprecedented hypocrisy and chutzpah.

The latest events have included a political betrayal, a political bombshell, a political misadventure, and a political castration. Political armageddon is now being forecast for next Monday.

“You could call it hyper-politics,” a political commentator commented.

“Of course, it is concerning. The politics we’re experiencing now are reaching a level the likes of which I have not seen since I was a junior reporter covering the empires of two thousand years ago.

“Under normal circumstances, politics are a consistently devastating exercise in delusion. And if these hyper-politics continue for much longer, the boundary between reality and fantasy, between truth and fiction, will blur so violently that you’ll believe your whole world is being shaken to its very core.

“But what you’d do well to remember is that this is still merely politics.

“This is an exercise in delusion that can be circumnavigated by simply having the strength of will and clarity of mind to see through it.”

Non-political events are also rumoured to be happening, but sources could not verify them at time of going to press.