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Latest in: media

  • Glorious sign of impending doom

    SUNSEEKERS have been enjoying fun and frolics as the nation… Continue Reading

    27th February 2019
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  • Nothing happening

    ABSOLUTELY nothing is occurring in the world. There are no… Continue Reading

    19th May 2018
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  • Universities full of clever folk

    UNIVERSITIES are populated by intelligent people, a newspaper has confirmed.… Continue Reading

    27th October 2017
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  • Bucket sellers with blood on their hands

    THE government will order bucket sellers to clamp down on… Continue Reading

    15th September 2017
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  • Billionaires disobeyed

    BILLIONAIRES are being disobeyed for the first time in their… Continue Reading

    10th July 2017
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  • Rattlesnake tastes fear, irrationality

    A RATTLESNAKE has picked up a strong whiff of fear,… Continue Reading

    16th April 2017
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  • ‘New media evil,’ claims old media

    MEDIA that has been recently created is being blamed for… Continue Reading

    30th March 2017
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  • Frog yet to jump out of heated pan

    A FROG has still not reacted to the increasing temperature of… Continue Reading

    4th September 2016
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  • Reality users ‘fucking it up’

    PEOPLE who inhabit unaltered reality “are a danger to themselves… Continue Reading

    13th August 2016
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  • Label attachers value haste over accuracy

    LABELS are being attached to people so fast their accuracy is… Continue Reading

    21st July 2016
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  • Truth lost

    FEARS are growing for the fate of The Truth with… Continue Reading

    12th June 2016
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  • Proof ‘proves nothing’

    IRREFUTABLE evidence of something happening is being refuted by people… Continue Reading

    21st May 2016
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  • Attractive person slain

    AN aesthetically-pleasing person has been murdered. The beautiful young human… Continue Reading

    26th March 2016
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  • Racism encouraged

    RACISM is being encouraged. Advisors claim that negative assumptions and… Continue Reading

    15th November 2015
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  • Team beats team

    A TEAM has won after beating the team it was… Continue Reading

    18th October 2015
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  • Famous person attends event

    A PERSON who is well known by a lot of… Continue Reading

    12th October 2015
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  • Anti-establishment guy hated by establishment

    AN ANTI-ESTABLISHMENT figure is being opposed by the establishment. Pillars of… Continue Reading

    16th September 2015
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  • Photo of bad event ‘make bad event worse’

    A PHOTOGRAPH taken of a bad event happening has reportedly… Continue Reading

    7th September 2015
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  • Extremist demands world peace

    FEARS are growing for the safety of humankind after a… Continue Reading

    24th August 2015
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  • Old people more likely to die

    OLD folk have a far higher mortality rate than young… Continue Reading

    12th August 2015
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  • Disaster yet to reach media kill threshold

    A NATURAL disaster that has killed hundreds, injured thousands, and… Continue Reading

    1st June 2015
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  • Newspapers still exist

    PERIODICAL publications containing news, analysis, comment, propaganda and fear are… Continue Reading

    8th May 2015
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  • Blue cars blamed for multistorey thefts

    CARS painted blue are to blame for a recent spate… Continue Reading

    20th March 2015
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  • Internet full of naked people

    THE internet is jam-packed with naked people, tabloid newspaper readers… Continue Reading

    20th January 2015
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  • Dictionary c*n***ed

    THE dictionary has been mysteriously c*n***ed. English s****ers woke up… Continue Reading

    10th December 2014
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  • Conspiracy theorist’s death ‘suspicious’

    A CONSPIRACY theorist has died in circumstances described by non-witnesses… Continue Reading

    17th November 2014
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  • Jailed drug dealer ‘sold peer-reviewed pills’

    A DRUG dealer who only sold evidence-based pills is finally… Continue Reading

    10th November 2014
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  • Virus now spreading to white people

    A DEADLY virus has spread to areas where lots of… Continue Reading

    20th October 2014
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  • Bonkers scientists say world will end ‘soon’

    CRAZY scientists say we must prepare for the end of… Continue Reading

    20th July 2014
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  • ‘Mindless thugs’ rebuild community centre

    A BUNCH of drunken, mindless thugs completely rebuilt a community… Continue Reading

    13th June 2014
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